Unfit for Human Consumption
by Don Fuller HMC Retired
It was early in the 1950's when HM 2 Orville Bizeau was returning to the
Dispensary from crash crew duty driving the trusted old field ambulance past
Gate #2. He noticed an old pear tree adjacent to the gate that had beautify
ripe pears just screaming to be picked. Not having a basket, Bizeau, using the
stokes stretcher placed it on the roof of the ambulance, climbed up and
gleefully began filling the stretcher with luscious ripe pears. The
Officer-of-the-Day (name withheld) passed by during his rounds and spied
Bizeau with the load of pears. The OOD ordered HM 2 Bizeau to pick the
remaining pears and take them to the galley as they were government property.
He did as ordered. The next morning Chief Schweitzer, better known as Mother
Schweitzer, called the Medical Officer and requested someone on his medical
team go to the galley and inspect a stretcher full of pears before dispensing
them to the crew at mess. HM 2 Bizeau cheerfully stepped foreword and
volunteered for the task. After careful examination of, one was found to
have a worm hole and Corpsman Bizeau declared the entire lot as " Unfit
for human consumption". He instructed Schweitzer to have the stretcher
and its contents returned to the Dispensary for proper disposal. The stretcher
was scrubbed down, sheets applied and returned to the field ambulance. In
the process the pears disappeared. It was rumored that someone saw Gert Bizeau
buying canning jars at Fisher's Market on Macomb Street on Grosse Ile the next
day.
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