Unfit for Human Consumption
by Don Fuller HMC Retired
 
It was early in the 1950's when HM 2 Orville Bizeau was returning to the Dispensary from crash crew duty driving the trusted old field ambulance past Gate #2. He noticed an old pear tree adjacent to the gate that had beautify ripe pears just screaming to be picked. Not having a basket, Bizeau, using the stokes stretcher placed it on the roof of the ambulance, climbed up and gleefully began filling the stretcher with luscious ripe pears. The Officer-of-the-Day (name withheld) passed by during his rounds and spied Bizeau with the load of pears. The OOD ordered HM 2 Bizeau to pick the remaining pears and take them to the galley as they were government property. He did as ordered. The next morning Chief Schweitzer, better known as Mother Schweitzer, called the Medical Officer and requested someone on his medical team go to the galley and inspect a stretcher full of pears before dispensing them to the crew at mess. HM 2 Bizeau cheerfully stepped foreword and volunteered for the task. After careful examination of, one was found to have a worm hole and Corpsman Bizeau declared the entire lot as " Unfit for human consumption". He instructed Schweitzer to have the stretcher and its contents returned to the Dispensary for proper disposal. The stretcher was scrubbed down, sheets applied and returned to the field ambulance. In the process the pears disappeared. It was rumored that someone saw Gert Bizeau buying canning jars at Fisher's Market on Macomb Street on Grosse Ile the next day.
 


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